Another one of those storiessss

OH MY GOD. you must be reading my mind! i agree with that ONE HUNDRED PERCENT. its incredible. i thought all of that, and the two friends that ive told about this situation, told me to just forget about it...but reading that i know now i was completly right! im not going to just forget about it...cuz its true, regret just fucking sucks! and since we're not talking now, not talking after wont be much different right!

anyways, i took that advice..before i even read that post...i talked to him yesterday over aim...but i dont like doing that cuz i never know if hes taking it serious or not...so i didnt really get into it, but i did say, i had some things on my mind and you will hear me out. and even though i really wanted to just call him a jackass, i didnt, cuz like you said, that just turns him off from listening even more.

i think it actually is going all right...and im going to ask him..even if it amounts to nothing, that he not tell the whole world about our situation, because im sure he wouldnt like it if my side of the story got out.

oh and the whole hope thing...yah thats right on the money too...and im going to say that...i didnt use that point yet cuz i didnt really think about it too much. but its true, he knew how i felt about him, so i couldnt understand why he persue this kinda relationship unless he was holding back..giving me hope.

so yah, next time i see him..prolly in a couple days, (im a busy social bee) im going to tell him all of that. running away is easy, but telling him straight to his face will give me the upperhand.

haha, i should just print out ur post and give it too him...cuz that was basically it in a nutshell.

I see what you mean. He probably would say something like that, because he probably doesn't understand fully that he's got the biggest problem out of the both you. He rejected you, but otherwise said he'd sleep with you. That's pretty sick, and it's wrong. He has no right to say anything bad about your behavior when he gave you that kind of option, because it's misleading. Even if he was straightforward with telling you he didn't want to date you, saying he'd sleep with you is a type of acceptance on his part. He can't complain that you took it for hope, when he knew that you cared when he said it. How else would you take it? Any small means of acceptance after rejection gives a person hope, and if he didn't want you to have any hope he should have rejected you flat. No matter how serious he was about that "I'll have sex with you" comment, it makes no difference, because he's still responsible for saying it. You've got him on two counts of asshole- the ass who'd use somebody's feelings for his own gain and the ass who's so cowardly he has to deny it. If you can't talk to him, write him a letter. He'll read it. Nobody gets a letter and doesn't read it..he might pretend he threw it away, but nobody ever actually does that. You won't come off as "melodramatic" for confronting him if you're thoughtful, calm, and collected about it. Besides, if you're no big deal to him like he's acting he wouldn't avoid you..he'd just be the same as he always was before. Confrontation doesn't have to be a lot of screaming and insults, it's better if you stay cool. It's ok to show that you're hurt, and don't try to act superior, don't call him names or make accusations- don't rile up his defenses, and just be honest about how what happened between you two affected you. Admit which faults were yours and apologize if you feel the need to, but insist that he was unfair and cruel and demand an apology. If you can't do that face to face then write a letter- it's easy to be calm and collected in a letter. I know you don't want to, but if he's avoiding you that's a big sign that he isn't so annoyed he wants nothing to do with you, (that's what he'll probably think to himself, but I doubt it's the truth)..the fact is he knows in his heart he's done you wrong, and he simply doesn't want to face you. He's probably not aware of that, so he'll probably try to turn it into all your fault. Don't fall for the lines he's telling himself. He gave you an inch and you took it..it blew up in your face and that's something you have to deal with, but he has no reason to be such a jerk about it, he should be responsible for his actions. I really, really think you should confront him, at least in a letter. I never really got to confront the person that hurt me, and now I'm stuck with all kinds of horrible regrets and confusion that have messed up a lot of potentially solid relationships. Maybe this thing isn't big enough of a deal to do that to you, but letting something that hurt you go without resolution can be more damaging than the event itself. Anyways, that's my advice, again, I really urge you to try it.

Oh good! I'm so proud of you! ^_^ *big hugs* good luck, I hope you get a good resolution, if not, at least you can be proud of yourself for trying. [img]smile.gif[/img]

ahh today is a bad day. i had to postpone my "breaking it off" talk cuz work got in the way. so friday is the day.

so i was excited about this talk...like i said i cant wait to be done with it and be on top for once.

but noo..today is a bad day. this is what happens when you stay up till 3:30am all alone drinking ice tea. u think way to god damn much. and now im going backwords. i feel kinda miserable right now. i really wish i wasnt put in this position. i really wish i didnt have that talk. im going to....but it sucks that i have to. im not asking for him to return feelings..u cant push that on someone...but damn it just understand me for one damn moment. dont turn everything into a joke. a person honestly cares for you and u ridcule them.

ahhh ok...more updates later. i must not regress. no more ice tea!

things should hopefully get easier once you're able to talk to him. Just be careful, try not to forget that you're talking to him to get him out of your life and not secretly looking for some small means of hope. Be strong, or he'll take advantage of you.

Hey, just thought I'd let you know that talking about this stuff, (and some other things too) helped to motivate me to find out where the guy that hurt me the most was, and try to talk to him so I could resolve the last few issues I've been unable to get out of my system. I sent him an email and asked if I could talk to him, and believe it or not, he agreed. I was really surprised. We haven't talked yet, but I'll let you know how it goes. It's either going to be very helpful, or a horrible disaster. I'm guessing the latter, but you never know.

Yah isnt it always the latter....and yet we still try dont we.

well...i talked to him..didnt do it in person cuz i didnt get a chance to see him, so i did it over aol. he had been saying he was going to come over in the morning and implying how we would fool around or whatever. he says them as jokes to cover himself when they backfire...but hes serious when he says these things. so instead of playing along i just flat out said..."dont bother trying. if thats what you are coming over for...dont, because nothing is going to happen. i dont want think anymore because it never goes anywhere" his reply--"you think to much...you think to much about the future"........im like "well yah, but its the truth...and as for future, this is the future, this has gone on for months now...i think ive waited long enough for you"...and then he says "you think to much....just like shareena...his ex-girlfriend" im like .......................whoa whoa whoa...taboo subject. we dont not speak their names. haha..yah im a dork but when im talking about us...i dont want to hear about *them*.

well...even though i said all that..he kinda dismissed it. like he didnt take me seriously. and he didnt because he came over the next day (oh and im home alone cuz i dont start school till sept 9 while everyone else is at school and work)...and hes expecting things. so i said no and pushed him away...but then he kissed me anyways..that really took me off guard...and i let it go on..but then my brain said "STOPPPPP" so i did...and tried to tell him how i didnt want this and how i was serious...

but i think he doesnt believe me. i think he knows that im very weak against him. so i must no be weak!!! even though today wasnt a total success im happy that i at least put it out there. so there is no joking around...and there are no suprises. i am serious..i just have to make him believe that.

anyways..yah i hope things go well for you..and even if they dont..i hope you feel better about trying. i know i do. he may not take me seriously..but im kinda proud of myself for saying something. i didnt give in ...cept for like ill say 20 seconds..but hey...anyways....good luck ^_^

whoa... that's some serious shit. o-o; at least you've learned a lot... i'm sure you'll never let anything like this happen again.

i hope everything works out. good luck and everything... ^_^ be strong! yeah!

<font face="comic sans ms">^^; major dramas.. ne? it's been a while since i've sat down on my comp... but newayz, your situation brings back bad BAD memories... i say you did a good job talking to the guy... cause if you didn't, you'd have been my case. cause i didn't talk to the guy... mainly cause i wanted to strangle the guy whenever i thought of him? so yeah... i didn't want to be so violent... but now i kinda regret it. i mean, it would've been nice to tell him how i felt but i figured it's too late now.. but at least your guy talked... bs here and there but still.. it's better than stop talking just like that. u know? which is my case... after all this stupid crap that we went through, he just stopped talking to me. so i was like wtf.. but i'm over it now. and to think, i was this close of doing it with him. hehe.. i'm ever so relieved.. but i learned not to trust any guys. EVER! BUT that was my case.. as for yours, i hope everything works out for you. *cheers for jadey* </font>

Oh! I am so proud of you! ^_^ *big hugs* you're a good girl! Keep that up, be strong...and the more and more you're able to resist him the stronger you'll feel...and if he shrugs you off for not doin' what he wants then you can proceed with the bitch slapping...he probably thinks you have no clue what he's doing, maybe he thinks he's some kind of player and's getting off on that..if so, what a retard. I dunno...let's just wait and see I guess.

As for me...well...people can change a lot in 2 years (that's how long it'd been since I last talked to him) I guess. I was really surprised that he was willing to talk to me...and when we did start talking he was actually...nice...which was very, very weird. He wasn't sweet, but he didn't insult me or try to make me feel bad or anything, which he always used to do when we got on bad terms. I asked him some questions and got the closure I needed, and we had a mild conversation about random stuff and then I said thank you goodbye. It was very difficult after that to keep my resolve to cut off contact again, but that's the final step for me now to get over him completely, so I was a good girl too and did so. So, now I can lose the regret, and move on. It feels strange to have lost the burden I was carrying for so long, it became a part of me..I feel kind of confused now *laughs* Anyways, I'm glad that I had the courage to swallow my pride and contact him, because I have the feeling it's going to make a world of difference to me in the future.